People often ask me how I balance my energy as an HSP when I’m leading retreats.
This is a question I’ve had to ask myself repeatedly over the years. Despite the capacities people see in me when I’m facilitating a group, I’ve faced plenty of leadership challenges.
Like most HSPs, I have a tendency to experience sensory overload when traveling. While I can handle quite a lot, my nervous system freaks out if I push past a certain point.
I also care deeply about the people I serve. I value providing experiences in which my clients feel supported. Yet, as an HSP who gives and feels a lot, I can wind up absorbing other people’s emotions if I’m not careful.
To show up fully for my retreat groups, it’s imperative that I make space for my own needs. Learning to balance my energy as an HSP has taken discernment and practice, but I’ve found a few things to be supportive.
Even if you’re not leading retreats, you might find a helpful nugget of wisdom here.
6 Things I Need to Balance My Energy as an HSP Retreat Leader
1) I create spacious schedules.
I know facilitators who are like energizer bunnies. They can happily teach and socialize all day long. This is not me. The downtime I structure into my retreat schedules is just as much for me as it is for my clients. I need time to rest, as well as to process experiences and emotions that come up if I’m going to prevent depletion. Even when I was working as a social worker, I was capable of really challenging work. Yet, I did best when I had the flexibility and autonomy to take breaks so I could close my eyes for a few minutes or even let out a few tears in the bathroom.
2) I ensure I have quiet personal space
As an HSP retreat leader, I spend a lot of time being there for others. I need a space that I can rely on as a safe haven of quiet and solitude. I usually ensure I have my own room set away from others. Sometimes I’ll share a room with a co-facilitator since this can allow for easier check-ins and communication. If I do share, I inform the other person in advance that I’ll need silence sometimes when we’re in the room together.
3) I adapt my personal practices.
The practices that help me balance my energy as at home are not necessarily what I need when leading retreats. Recently, I started a Morning Pages practice. I was in a consistent flow of writing three pages every morning. But I accepted this would change during a retreat, as I knew good sleep would be a more functional practice. So, I wrote however many pages at whatever time of day I felt drawn to write. When it comes to my yoga practice, one reclined yoga pose or sitting in meditation before teaching yoga feels more grounding than an elaborate asana practice. The simplest of practices help me regulate and recharge. I lie on the ground with my legs elevated, close my eyes, and allow myself to be held.
4) I work with partners I trust to provide support.
I learned the value of support when I broke my foot in Guatemala two days before my first retreat ever. That’s a story, but it showed me how important it is to have people to lean on (sometimes literally). I typically hire an assistant and make a point to work with venues and guides that I really trust will provide support. It helps that the local guides I work with take the reins when they’re guiding. This gives me the opportunity to relax and enjoy experiences alongside my clients. One thing I’m still practicing is the skill of delegating–and recognizing when I’m taking on a role that someone else can do.
5) I communicate my boundaries.
As a facilitator, it’s my responsibility to be accessible to participants. This means that there are times when I sacrifice some alone time in order to answer questions or tend to someone’s needs. That being said, I also remind myself that I’m allowed to have boundaries. When I first began leading retreats, I’d often drop whatever I was doing to help someone. I’ve learned to reel in this tendency. Now I confirm I’m glad to help, but if it’s not an urgent matter, I’ll propose a time to chat after I’ve given myself time to recharge.
6) I embody “enough”.
There was a time I placed pressure on myself to get everything “right” in my retreats. I’d have a nagging feeling that I had to plan every detail of my classes. I constantly noticed shortcomings or would feel self-critical. I’ve faced major challenges during these retreats: breaking a foot, mountains of stinky sargassum seaweed washing ashore, and even a trip highlight being closed last minute. Still, even with the biggest setbacks, I have clients who will still comment about how much they loved their retreat. My experience over the last seven years has taught me that whatever I do is enough, as long as it’s with intention, care, and integrity.
Final Thoughts on Balancing Energy as an HSP Leader
There are many ways to approach energy management as an HSP. If you’re in a leadership role, it’s important to identify and assess your own strengths and needs to know what’s right for you. Making space for your needs will help sustain your energy and allow you to actually show up for others in the way you intend.
Of course, if you’re interested in joining me on a retreat, I invite you to check out my upcoming HSP Retreats.
Photo by PNW Production