Is generational junk weighing you down?
When it comes to what we inherit over generations, there’s plenty to treasure and keep alive. But there’s also quite a bit that can keep us stuck, both individually and collectively.
Recently, I was working through some “generational junk”, a term that popped up in my social media feed with this
podcast episode from The Minimalists.
There are other forms of generational junk that I’ll speak to in a moment.
But this podcast focused on what to do with items such as heirlooms, collections, and mementos, as well as how to have conversations with loved ones about these things.
It was timely, as I knew I wanted to pare down boxes of “stuff” passed down from my mom. I’ve cleared out some things through the years, but I still had enough where it felt burdensome.
I tearfully joked with my partner that we could have an “Ugly Room of Memories” someday. We’d have a sign that says, “Oh, you don’t want to go in there. That’s the Ugly Room of Memories.”
Alas, it seemed wiser to purge some items now.
I tossed thousands of photos (still have thousands), report cards, art projects, etc. Like many HSPs, I tend to feel bad for inanimate objects, so it was hard to throw out my mom’s childhood dolls. But they were gross and I could no longer keep an allergen-covered Raggedy Ann that would eternally live in a bin.
Having worked in a program reconnecting kids in foster care to their relatives and family stories, I know the value in having meaningful items that represent where we come from. I also learned in that time that just a few items are really enough.
But you know what really helped me shed some generational junk?
I didn’t want my own avoidance to weigh my loved ones down when I pass.
I realized that if I avoid parting ways with these things now, one day it will become someone else’s burden.
Gosh, ain’t that the truth with other forms of generational burdens?
After all, generational junk can also come in the forms of:
- Carrying around loved ones’ painful burdens
- Participating in dysfunctional family dynamics
- Upholding or remaining passive to oppressive social contracts
Throughout my life, I’ve aimed to face these forms of generational junk head-on to support healing in myself, family system, and societal systems. Avoidance only perpetuates unhealthy systems and takes a toll on the well-being of our current society and future generations.
Knowing that there is a connection between our personal burdens and our collective burdens, maybe a little extra work sorting out our own hand-me-downs can have impacts far beyond just the number of boxes in our closets.
With whatever generational junk you’re carrying, I invite you to take inventory. Ask yourself:
1) Why do I want to pass this onto future generations?
2) What’s important to keep alive and what has become a burden to shed?
3) Rather than making assumptions or imposing values on the next generation, how can I hear what’s important to them?
A little reflection around these questions can help alleviate your own burdens and lighten the load for future generations.
At the same time, it’s okay to take this in pieces without creating unnecessary overwhelm.
Now, over to you…
What generational junk are you carrying? What is one small step you can take to begin to address it?
Read: Generational Junk #2: How to Keep Your Junk out of Landfills
Photo by Charisse Kenion on Unsplash
